It’s Okay To Be Not Okay

How Many of you have this habit of saying, “I am fine. I am okay”, even if you are not?

As I always say that we are not trained to express what we feel exactly, most of us have learnt to say, “I am okay.”

Friends, when we say, “Okay”, instead of, “No, I am not Okay”, we are denying many emotions. 

May be our anger, or grief, or disappointment, or fear and anxiety.

It could be anything. 

Denying Your emotions = Denying The Part Of Your Existence.

Let me give one example from my experience –

So, I was on this online session with a client and doing therapy on her. Her eyes were closed and she was following what I was telling her to say. Now in between our session her small kid entered the room and sat on her lap. But she continued, so I continued. 

Now this must be unusual for her son. So, he removed one of her earphones to grab her attention. She still continued; I continued. Then he started patting on her shoulder. then he tried to kiss her on her cheek continuously. So, in short, he was trying every possible way to grab her attention. But he didn’t go anywhere.

Emotions we feel are just like that friend, like a child. They don’t understand LOGIC, when to come up, when not to come up.

They will keep trying every possible channel to come up.

And more you ignore them, deny them, they too will apply force and techniques or sometimes erupt like a volcano.

Isn’t it better to just pay attention, see what exactly is happening [though it was not possible in my session as she was in trance ], and realize, or diagnose? 

Only which you are aware of, you can accept, challenge and deal with it the best way you can.

Many wait for others to understand instead of simply expressing.

But this unnecessary waiting also is a waste of time & energy, as not everyone is going to understand things at your level.

When you admit, and express, “I am not Okay”, only then there are chances of change or transformation. Isn’t it?

By denying your unease, you are denying your care, your healing, your well-being. And so, your right, your self-worth.

So, think of it carefully.

Do not say, “I am okay”, if you are not.

© Dr. Shilpa Pol [DSP]